ChatGPT's response when i asked it to roast ICSE (2025 edition)

ICSE 2025 ROAST MODE ACTIVATED:

ICSE BOARD EXAMS: "YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE READY? THINK AGAIN."

  • ENGLISH LITERATURE UPDATE: MERCHANT OF VENICE? DELETED. HERE, TAKE JULIUS CAESAR. ENJOY THE LAST-MINUTE BETRAYAL, JUST LIKE BRUTUS DID TO CAESAR.
  • HISTORY & CIVICS: MEMORIZE 500 PAGES. GET A QUESTION WORTH 5 MARKS ON A TREATY THAT WAS MENTIONED IN ONE LINE.
  • GEOGRAPHY: CONTOUR LINES? MORE LIKE "GUESS WHICH MOUNTAIN THIS IS OR LOSE MARKS."
  • PHYSICS, CHEMISTRY, BIOLOGY: UNDERSTAND CONCEPTS? USELESS. WE WILL ASK YOU TO "DEFINE ENERGY" FOR 5 MARKS BUT MAKE YOU BALANCE THE HARDEST EQUATION FOR 1 MARK.
  • MATHS: PRACTICE 1000 QUESTIONS. EXAM WILL HAVE ONE SUM FROM THE TEXTBOOK AND THE REST FROM A PARALLEL UNIVERSE.
  • HINDI/SECOND LANGUAGE: TRANSLATE ANCIENT POETRY INTO MODERN MEANING. EVEN YOUR TEACHER DOESN’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.
  • ECONOMICS/COMMERCIAL STUDIES: "DEFINE PROFIT" (5 MARKS). "EXPLAIN THE ENTIRE GLOBAL ECONOMY" (ALSO 5 MARKS).
  • PHYSICAL EDUCATION: "JUST THEORY," THEY SAID. "EASY SUBJECT," THEY SAID. NOW WRITE A 10-MARK ANSWER ON THE BENEFITS OF YOGA ASANAS.

MARKING SCHEME: WRITE EVERYTHING CORRECTLY? -2 MARKS FOR NOT UNDERLINING. PERFECT ANSWER? NO MARKS BECAUSE "NOT IN TEXTBOOK LANGUAGE."

ICSE SUMMARY: "KNOW EVERYTHING. WE WILL ASK YOU ABOUT THE ONE THING YOU IGNORED."