So I finally did it and now I regret...

So, just had my first time real experience of sex as a bottom and i remember that sometime ago i did a post on this sub to whether do it or not, and someone told me to just have a random hookup.

So, just this monday i had big craving for cock and i was losing control so i tried to flirt with my neighbours, long story short, they bought it and yesterday these both black guys were in my room and fucking hell the rumours are true... both were packing something, i have no idea of exact measurement or anything but definitely 9 to 11 inches, and fat as fuck! - i was afraid but at least in my imagination i was excited and aroused but this didn't worked out well in real life event, as they were really degrading me, calling me names like fag, bitch, etc and were rough. one guy tried to put it in my butt but he was too fat and just the tip of penis was hurting as well, thank god his girlfriend or idk who, but someone called and he left, and now the other guy was the only one left but he was not leaving not like i wanted him to leave or anything but i asked him if we can just do rubbing, kissing and maybe bj not penetration at least not today cuz he was packing something big too and i had no lube with me and neither did he, but he keep on begging and made me use vaseline and damn fucking hell, it was painful, all in all, total shitty painal experience it was... i am sorry, many here are pros at this job but i wanted to just rant and let it out of my chest so here it is