AITAH for thinking my wife is disrespectful, shady or possibly cheating.

We’ve been together five years and work in the same place. She’s been caught having conversations with my co worker friends about one of her ex’s dick size. She’s told me more than a couple times how hot or what a good looking body this co worker or that co worker has (even when I’ve asked her to stop). She’s been caught deleting messages from at least one of these co workers. She’s continually talked about our sex life at work (not in a bad way) and when asked to stop continued to do it. She buys sex toys without having any discussion with me about it and won’t introduce them into our sex life. She says she is happy in our marriage and sex life. I am having a hard time believing it because if these things weren’t going on I would be very happy and I’ve never had the urge to do anything remotely close to any of these things.