feeling depressed on my birthday

i've never used reddit before, not sure how to but i have no one else to talk to about this. i turned 19 today and am feeling extremely upset. important context but i'm not close with my family. I only talk to my parents & we dont like each other much- they only ask me for money & help with my little brother (13). I had two friends but one killed himself 2 years ago- i'm still close with my other friend but he was busy today. I also haven't seriously celebrated my birthday since i was 15.

all i asked for today were acne patches and some cash to keep me floating until my last paycheck (recently quit my job). Instead, my father gets none of that and regifts me a cigar and leather case thing a friend of his got him. Ive never smoked a cigar, never even showed showed interest in smoking a cigar. Am i selfish for feeling so upset by this? I've been having an especially hard time recently and all i got was essentially trash. i'm never going to use this, i can't even sell it cause who the fuck would buy this? Idk what i'm even looking for with posting this, i guess i just feel extremely sad and lonely. i usually do on my birthday but this is pretty bad. Any advice is appreciated, any comment at all is appreciated really. thanks for reading & i hope your day is going better then mine.