What should i do ? Is it all my fault?

Me (19F) the person I’m with (24M) So we know each other since 2017 but we only got close at 2021, we were playing games and talk a lot and as we get closer we kept doing things only lovers do. one day he said when are you going to say i love you and lets watch movies and tv shows together and sit on my lap and i did. one day he changed at November 2021 and he was saying oh I’m with my girlfriend and dont call me “daddy” my gf is jealous so i was curious, is he lying?. I checked his Twitter account turns put there is a girl he plays with mentioning each other many times. I was so sad so i talked to her as another girl who is in love with her and i told her leave this guy im sure he is a player (i talked to her because i know i have no right to talk to him since he is not my boyfriend). she said was he is not my boyfriend he is just a friend and she was sure that he is good and not talking with other girls so unfortunately i logged into his account but guessing his password. his dms was full of girls one of them was just a girl showing him her body and he tell her to do this and that and calling her stuff and he enjoys her body and the girl i talked to was sending him nudes and he was talking to her the same way he talks to me. when he woke up he was like did u logged in my account i said no because i was afraid and ashamed of what ive done, and then she blocked him and we stayed together and he is okay with me calling him “daddy” again. all of these happened at January 2022 so we stayed that year doing good and doing the same things as before but deeper and better, at November 2022 when the football world cup started I noticed that he is changing and again he said he dont want me to call him “daddy” again for a while so i did the same thing. i checked his account turns out there is another girl he talks to and they are watching anime together and stuff so i talked to her again as a friend and i told her you should focus on yourself and block all the boys (in her religion you cant talk to boys). so i told her its much better to do this and I didn’t talked about him a lot so she made a new account and told me she will start a new beginning and after a while she ignored me . so I talked to him as another person and he responded immediately but when i was talking with him in my number he was ghosting me for 4 hours and i told him I’m an astrologer and i told him his sign and said “there is a person you know and you are making him/her tired your energy is bad” and he blocked me. so this time i just left him and the girl as an anonymous but we stayed together, they were talking a little bit at December and they left each other at January 2023, now he is okay with me calling him “daddy” again since December. and at 2023 it was a perfect year soo perfect we were doing things only lovers do i swear and i didn’t checked his account for a lonnggg time until one day i was working in twitter and i saw a girl that could be his type so I checked her followers. unfortunately he is following her and i was sending him a follow request idk why, he said why are you doing this ? I said I’m sorry i dont know… and he was angrrrryyy and mad for a week maybe and i was begging him this whole week for forgive me this was November 2023. but anyways it was only a week and we were good and all until one day he was changing again and i felt like “oh my god is it happening AGAIN ?” I checked his account and it was happening AGAIN. at first i did nothing at all until January 16 2024 i talked to the girl as a girl who is in love with her and i told her that he looks like a weirdo and a player she said i have feelings for him and i was in disbelief and my heart dropped i told her why?? She said he is so good with me. i asked her is he in love with you too ? She said yes maybe and i was crying soo bad but i had to act cool because i love HER yk. so i showed her my old account and its full of us doing everything together and showed her his tweets about me and i was like oh my god I’m so sorry for you girl you deserve better and you should leave him and she blocked him and he started to change. until one day i asked him why are you treating me like this ? He said tell me the truth are you the person who did all of these things (we talked about it a year ago maybe and i swore it wasn’t me) but this time he blocked me when i kept denying it wasn’t me so i gave up and told him yes it was me. he started saying every bad word in the world to me you are a terrible person and blah blah and blocked me, i was SO sad i made many Twitter accounts with the username please unblock me give me one chance and begging him. he said if I apologised to every girl i talked to about him he will (sometimes at 2022 i was sending some messages to the girl at curiouscat saying eww what do you want from him and shit like this) and i did apologise. while he was thinking i talked to a girl i knew before and told her and she showed her friend turns out her friend did knew him before too and she said he was talking about me to her and mocking me and the last girl i talked to said the same thing one thing he told her “what should i do if someone kept sending me gifts but I’m not interested in her”. so after he is done thinking he talked to me and said I’ll give you another chance but don’t to these things again i said yes of course and we kept talking as before but this time not as we were before not like i lovers no this time as friends. (I can’t edit but when I admitted and told him yes it was me he said you have no right to all of these and as who ?? Who are you to do things like this and get jealous??my girlfriend?As we weren’t talking like a couple). so yeah we were friends until February and one day he said I can’t believe you talked about me behind my back like this, i said even that girl was talking about you and she called you f word her and her boyfriend he said i dont care about her I’m talking about you and we closed this argument and i left my house at morning without my phone. and when i got back home he was like “you told the girl that you were spoiling me ??” I told him she is lying and you know that she is a liar because she lied about him before and i swore no i didnt and he said i dont want to talk to you. we didn’t for 3 days but i couldn’t so I apologised to him and promised him i wont do anything again and he forgave me and we talked again this was at February, march at first we were talking like friends but the end of it noooo we were talking the lovers we were before so is April and may. now we are in jun we were playing elden ring at 3rd june and we talked like lovers like always, but two weeks after he said dont call me daddy or any of these stuff and he dont want to so i told him why???? U just called me that two weeks ago he said i tell every girl the same thing and you are not the only one. from that day until now we don’t treat each other and talk like lovers and these months he always trying to make me mad and when i tell him I’m sad or upset he says that he dont care. he always talk about the problem that happened before (the problem is everything i talked about before) and how is it all my fault and i deserve nothing my existence is useless and he hates me so much BUT we talk and play a lot so idk about this one. and yesterday i told him I’m sad, he said okay i told him why you don’t care about me ???? He said you deserve it and talked about the problem. and i told him can we bring a 3rd person to see what is he going to say about the problem and who is wrong and we can solve it he said what the fuck is wrong with you you are a weirdo i dont want to solve it i want to get rid of you and its only 2 months and then i will leave you and won’t see you again. why do we solve it i dont want to and he is maaddd so i told him I’m sorry I’m stupid and we were quite for 10 minutes and he closed the call.

TL;DR Now the thing is i know what i did was wrong but is it really my fault? Is everything my fault and i deserve to d1e ? He did nothing wrong ?