One of my best friends, who I’ve known since we were kids, just confessed he’s been in love with me for the past 10 years.

I (20F) have been best friends with 2 guys nearly my whole life. I met Dom (20M, not his real name) when we were in kindergarten, and then we met Ian (21 M, not his real name) in 5th grade. After graduating high school, I moved out of my parents house and in with my sister (31F). I hadn’t seen Ian or Dom in 9 months until recently, they came up to visit me for New Years.

This is where the story gets a little weird. Ian had found out I was actually starting to see someone who he was related to. It blew up. Dom was angry, and the relative of Ian I was seeing decided to not continue anything with me for the sake of his family. It hurt me a lot cause I really liked him, but I’m just trying to accept what happened and we are all trying to be friends again.

When it blew up, New Years came and Ian confessed he has been in love with me for a whole decade. Around the second year of knowing me back in middle school. He said he tried his best to move on from it, but being my best friend and having such a close connection made it hard. That every hardship we had gone through, we’ve always been there for each other. No matter what. Even when we were mad at each other, we wouldn’t hesitate to be there if something happened.

2024 was a very rough year for me. I had gotten broken up with by a girl I thought I would be with for a long time. People came back into my life that I wasn’t sure about and I was right, ended badly, and then the one year anniversary of my grandma’s passing was rough as well. Ian and Dom were there for me, hanging out and drinking. It was fun. They helped me get over it. Then Ian’s uncle passed, and of course Dom and I were there in a heartbeat.

Ian and I text a lot and play video games every night. It’s kind of hard now though after knowing how he feels. When he and Dom went home, I cried about all of it. Ian’s feelings, his relative who stopped seeing me for Ian’s sake, and Dom’s anger.

The more I’m thinking now, I’m wondering if I should give Ian a chance. It’s weird, I know. But, he is literally such a sweetheart, he’s generous and polite. He’s well- mannered and makes me crack up laughing. I’m wondering if I should just go for it or if I should just give him the space he needs to move on. I don’t know what to do. I told Ian I didn’t feel the same. I’m not really sexually attracted to him, but I think he’s cute and nice. But, I’m afraid not being sexually attracted to him will just mess it up for me and him.

I have no idea what to do. I think I want to try and see with Ian, but I am scared. I think he would make such a good boyfriend and my family loves him. Maybe I shouldn’t. Or, maybe I should?

Is there anyone else out there that’s felt like this or gone through the same situation?

EDIT/ UPDATE?: I’ve decided against being with Ian. I’ve talked it out with some people and I’ve read your comments. I don’t want to lose my friendship with him but I think it’ll be best to give him space. I’ve decided that if anything is to blossom, then it would’ve already. I love him a lot, and I know he will be okay in the end. Thank you all for your comments and support!