Terrified of Job Change

Hi friends :)

So recently I’ve had a whole lot of frustrating stuff happen. Essentially a year ago I left my old job that I loved and worked throughout high school for a new job at a shoe store. I’ve worked at this shoe store ever since and have absolutely fallen in love with my job. Of course it’s still a job, so there’s been bad management here and there and other issues, but overall I don’t think I’d ever leave this job if I had a choice.

But of course, things started to get worse with management and I felt that the whole place was gonna fall apart … so the stress of that lead me to looking for a new job. Luckily, I found a new job and it pays like GREAT but I’ve only worked five shifts or so and I just can’t do it. It seems like everytime I try a new job outside of the two I have absolutely loved I freak OUT. It’s not even like “this is horrible I have to leave”, they’re like decent jobs w good hours and good money, but my brain just freaks out and I will uncontrollably cry all day if I try to show up for the job. It feels really pathetic- but anyways I’m already not going back to this new job and sticking with my previous company to take a management role that’ll hopefully help our store do better.

I hate that I’m like this but emotionally I just cannot help it. Thinking about leaving my job made me sick to my stomach and I couldn’t even eat today or last night. I’m so utterly attached and change is so so so hard for me that I just like physically cannot do it.

So really I’m just looking for support? Do any of you relate to this? I feel so bad that I’ve started three other jobs in the last year and immediately quit because I just couldn’t handle the change. It makes me feel so awful inside…