"Her experience"

Wondering if anyone else has experienced this with their pwBPD.

One of the biggest themes and sources of conflict with her was that she felt that I didn't care about her experience. I would make every effort to ask her to talk to me about what she was experiencing and going through, to tell her that her feelings were valid. But inevitably I would always be told that didn't respect or care about her experience. It was always about me, always on my terms. Any attempt to repair a rupture was me just trying to absolve myself and clear my name.

And yet the irony was that she rarely/never asked me how I was feeling about things, what my experience was. My attempts at resolution (which usually wound up becoming a new conflict) usually resulted in her going off about all of the things I do wrong and how they affect her.

It was absolutely crazy making. Feeling like my experience was never being considered while being told I didn't give a fuck about her experience. It started to really make me question myself...

It reached the point where even the word "experience" has become mildly triggering.