It's just slapstick until you bring up how it would look if the genders were reversed

The defense you see for female-on-male violence in anime is that it's "just comedy," but the people who make that defense just stop replying when you say the five magic words: "If the genders were reversed..." I wonder why that is? Could it be that if the genders were reversed, this would actually look horrifying?

Let me give an example. So, the story is about a guy who finds out he's in an arranged marriage with a the daughter of his father's old friend, which is a problem because he hates women. However, his fiancé has a very flexible gender identity, but still identifies as a female. Unfortunately, due to a misunderstanding in regards to that person's gender, he labels her a pervert, always assumes the worst of her, and would beat the crap out of her if she egged him on. Every now and then, that girl encounters guys who fall for her, but she's clearly not interested in them. Those guys would often get affectionate with them against her consent. One of them even drugs her and tries to assault her. However, instead of offering her sympathy, the guy calls her a slut. So, a misogynist frequently abuses her and even victim blames her for nearly getting sexually assaulted. Flip the genders, and I just described Ranma 1/2.

Here's another story. So, there's this girl who used to be a prodigy with piano, but childhood trauma forced her to retire. However, a guy at his school saw him perform and wants him to start playing again, but her trauma is holding her back. Instead of respecting her boundaries, he, with the help of her childhood friend, follow her around, plaster sheet music everywhere, hijack the school's PA system playing classical music, and hit her with a baseball with a threatening message telling her to play. The guy then repeatedly kicks her and tells her to stop being so negative and play even when she can't. To add insult to injury, despite her history as an abuse victim, the guy would keep beating the crap out of her for minor annoyances. To review, he ignored her mental health, tried to trigger a PTSD attack when she said "no," and assaulted a child abuse victim. Flip the genders, and I just described Your Lie In April.

My final story is about a shy artist. One day, she meets a guy who takes a sudden interest in her, and starts teasing her. However, that teasing gets pretty mean-spirited. Despite making it abundantly clear she doesn't appreciate it, he keeps harassing her, pushes her off a bridge into a creek, verbally assaults her until she starts crying, and laughs at her to add insult to injury. His idea of "teasing" is straight up sadism, but instead of pressing charges against him, she for some reason enjoys being around him. So on top of being abused until she cried, she developed Stockholm Syndrome. Flip the genders, and I just described "Don't Mess With Me, Ms. Nagatoro."

See what I mean? Fans play these off as harmless slapstick, but flip the genders, and I just described psychological horror.