(Update and questions) Timing about asking out a woman I met in person
Thank you all for the answers to my previous post on this subreddit! Link for reference to previous post is at the bottom of this post's body:
TLDR: We already had 2 dates! How much of a role should shared interests have when it comes to determining whether two people are a good fit for a relationship (paragraphs 4 and 5)? What are important things to be looking out for in a relationship? As I asked/stated in the previous post: am I overthinking things?
I asked her out for coffee, she said yes! First date went great! We talked, shared a little about what we think about relationships/dating in general (some intro questions to the topic really), and scheduled a 2nd date (which was only 2 days later mainly because my work schedule).
2nd date was a bit more difficult to maintain a conversation. I believe in part because I woke up in an "off day" when it comes to the dating side of things. Maybe I have too much on my mind in other areas of my life. I am unsure. I am not trying to judge too much based off of one off day though. The positives from what I know about her: she is extremely intelligent, she is very articulate, very expressive, has a great head on her shoulders, passionate, and is very attractive. The thing that is difficult for me is that, as hinted in the TLDR, we do not have many shared interests. This, in my opinion, makes it difficult for us to talk in detail and have more light hearted conversations. I am not so much of an artsy kind of person (which is where her interests lie). If she had a conversation with the right person, she could have an amazing conversation from morning to evening just on that. But I do not know enough to even begin asking her questions. The things I am interested in she is not naturally interested in either (sports, although I am not a huge fan, I mainly like working out and I will look at results depending on the situation). It almost seems like we are coming from completely different worlds lifestyle wise. I will say that we are able to have decent conversations about theology/doctrine/Christianity. We both agree on basics of a relationship and what each of us would want out of a future marriage and future dating. Some of our best conversations came from discussing the dating/relationship side of life. However, my questioning comes from the fact that I am not sure it would be good to get into a relationship with someone and the only thing we talk about is our relationship and we are unable to talk about much else and relate with each other in other areas of life.
I suppose I am struggling with the idea that what I am looking for (eventually and with the right person I do not want to put pressure on myself or another person) is a relationship that can lead to marriage. I understand people say that it is good not to marry someone who is exactly like you. I also understand that marriage should have a different dynamic than a friendship (I am not looking just for a workout buddy/friend in a marriage). I am having difficulty identifying the main points that should make up a romantic/marriage/SO type of a relationship, and how that should be different from a relationship with a good/great friend.