What or where am I going wrong?

Love the game. Got it 2-3 months ago but don’t have much time to play due to having a full time job, a wife, and kid. I’m level 27 so still newish. My thing is I read all these posts about good commanders, good squad leaders, open communication, teams having mics, and fun matches. I probably get 1/10 maybe 2/10 matches where I get people with mics. But I’ve never come across anyone giving good directions or being helpful. More often then not I come across SL and commanders being shitasses and toxic for me not knowing ALL the ins and outs of the game. I want to help the squad. I try to communicate as useful as I can. I’m open to take any role, direction, or guidance that’ll help the team but somehow I still end up in games with shit commanders and squad leaders that expect me to be some Pro level player. Any suggestions on what I can do are appreciated. Sincerely, A Dad/Husband in his 30’s that’s try to enjoy his 3-5 hours gaming per week.