Where is the Goddamn Screwdriver?

Hello it's me Agent 47, master assassin. My MO? Making every kill look like an accident. This time I have the perfect plan, all I need to do is sabotage a simple piece of equipment. However, despite being a professional with numerous assets at my disposal including some of the most advanced assassination equipment and weaponry the ICA has to offer I cannot pack the Humble screwdriver.

"No worries" I think to myself. The area I am going to is full of maintenance workers. Surely there will be a screwdriver lying around somewhere. Just my luck. Every single toolbox instead contains a wrench or hammer. How could this happen? I had a perfect mindmap of the location, nearly every detail memorized, how can I not remember where a simple screwdriver is?

At this point I'm desperate, I'm extremely far from where I'm supposed to be searching in every single corner. Suddenly a Security guard lazily looking out a window drops his donut and stares at me. "Hey you don't look like you're supposed to be here." Somehow he recognizes that I'm not one of the 50 different identical looking maintenance workers. I panic and try to leave but before I know he's decided to handle this situation in the most professional manner possible; by pulling a gun on me. I panic, I can't let anyone hear a gunshot. So I use my master assassin skills to punch him in the face and knock him out instantly. Problem solved.

That is, until some random lady who I didn't even know could see us screams "Oh my god that poor man!" and runs away. 3 minutes and 1 firefight later at least 16 security guards and 2 civilians are dead. One for the genius idea of running into the middle of a gunfight and the other for wearing a snazzy black suit that unfortunately looked a lot like an elite guard uniform.

"Well fuck it looks like I'm not getting silent assassin anyway." I say as I pick up the dead guard's legally distinct M-16. The mission is over. There are now 50 casualties, over 100 witnesses and at least 7 different people lying unconscious in only their underwear. The remaining security rush past a bloodied ice cream salesman on their way to throw their bodies at the man who single highhandedly killed all of their comrades and don't look twice as the ice cream man climbs into a helicopter clearly owned by the rich CEO and takes off.

My earpiece buzzes. "What the hell happened back there 47?"

"All I needed was a goddamn screwdriver Diana!"