This Phaggot Made a Gofundme

Hi guys. I’m Nick James, if you don’t know me that’s ok. If you watch the show, I’m the guy who made the “My real name is Cocksucker Phaggot” on episode #695.

I’m also the guy on episode #639 with Tim Dillon who told a joke about black homeless people and got fired from my job for it. Then, totaled my car. Well, this Phaggot finally caved and started a gofundme because it’s been a year and I’m tired of walking to work and back. Here’s the link: https://gofund.me/5b478bbd

If you guys want the whole story, I posted on here before about it. But here’s the short version:

I bombed with a hacky black joke, I doubled down in the interview, then mentioned the place that I worked at (parking lot attendant at Indeed), THEN I talked about a guy who set himself on fire and jumped off the roof over there. So at least I wasn’t the only one who got fired, but still. Turns out the contract that I signed without reading it says I’m not allowed to mention or badly represent the company online. Plus it’s just shitty, dumb behavior on my part. I deserved it, I don’t blame anyone but myself.

Thankfully got a new job shortly after, but then I got into a car accident right after. Totaled it. Insurance fucked me on the settlement because I still owed money on the car loan. I had just sank most of my savings into car repairs, on top of having to pay rent, utilities, etc without income, so I couldn’t buy a new one, not on my credit. For the last year I’ve worked without a car, trying to save money, and it sucks. It’s slow going, I have some savings, but I was hoping to speed up the process by asking for donations. By that I mean, if I have to walk and waste money on Uber rides for another year, I’ll go bonkers.

It’s ok if you don’t give, I’m just trying to get the word out in case of some of you might share the link. If you do feel like donating, no pressure to go crazy, money’s tight all around. Even something as small as a penny or a dollar helps.

Anyways, I have to go blow out the candles on my birthday cake, so hopefully my wish comes true and some kind strangers pull through. You guys have a great day, god bless, and always remember…

This. Is. Kill Tony.

Edit: gee thanks guys for the support. I know it was a long shot asking for help on the most non-toxic sub on Reddit, but you really came through!

Personally I would have preferred a $1 donation or something, but the lulz I got from 6 guys telling me to go fuck myself instead were sure worth it.

Edit 2: That was sarcasm. The real MVPs were the 20 or so people that shared it. In the couple of hours after I posted this, I ended up getting a small injection of donations. Now I’m almost halfway to my first fundraising goal. For those silent saints who resisted the urge to talk shit and instead just quietly helped out, you’re fucking awesome. Thank you.