Husband Doesn’t Approve HRT

Hello ladies. Please note that I’ve read the menopause wiki- Thank you for this! My stubborn husband of 27 years in a fairly happy marriage (who doesn’t even take Tylenol for a headache) pulled up a search on “what is HRT” in a span of 5-minutes and read “breast cancer”. I’m 50 and going through the symptoms as many of you. I’ve also been prescribed Climara from my doctor who didn’t even blink an eye when prescribing. Hot flashes are pretty consistent throughout the day (peeling off clothes, kicking off sheets..what exactly is a blanket in the stone cold middle of winter?) no clue. Anyhow, he and I just had what feels like 12-hours of discussion (and I’m exhausted)..he “loves me so much.. I want to grow old with you…why take the risk for long term issues , ie cancer, for symptoms that you’ll only have to endure for a short time?… my Mother .. your Mother didn’t take HRT … you’re strong like them …” —— I just can’t ladies.. and trust me when I tell you there is no amount of convincing - and if there is, please tell me how. My personal question .. if I don’t take the HRT at all and “tough it out”.. my concerns are the longer term effects of my estrogen depleting. A few things to note: I am fairly strong as I “lift heavy sh*t” and have for 10+ years (gym rat) so although I’m Asian & Caucasian mix and “prone” to Osteoporosis, I feel like I might have this one under control. I’m more concerned with losing my mind - dementia/Alzheimers…are these genuine concerns and if we are recommended to patch for 2-5 years max, is this enough HRT to steer clear of the Alzheimer’s and other longer term issues, heart issues? Thanks for any feedback and apologies if I’ve left out any detail..

UPDATE I shared a lot of detail so I’ve removed much of it so as not to make this post so lengthy.

First and foremost, apologies for triggering emotions - I have read most comments and do see where the majority rules here. I understand that my decision is final.

Thank you ALL for your thoughtful replies.. & well, some not so thoughtful but had good intention.. We had another chat tonight (3rd one today) and I’m tired of discussing this but I did sit and listen. Bottom line is he wants me around, to live and enjoy each other, to be healthy in our later years and not have just a percentage of me healthy b/c I decided to take a risk at age 50 and I’ve jeopardized my health to live a bit more comfortable now. Feels we continue to go in circles and he has dug in his stance. He did say and had always said “it’s your body, you can do what you want”.. he just doesn’t agree. He did agree to meet with and speak to the doctor that prescribed the Climara. This is a good first step. We will meet with her next week. I feel that her stance will be 100% of what most feel here and she will be able to use statistics and spit facts better than I have. My decision is to wear the patch to find relief. He won’t leave me over it but it will be a topic of discussion (often). Lastly, he never wants to touch the patch anywhere on my body and doesn’t want to be close to it even if I cover it with Tegaderm. He doesn’t want it to affect him in any way possible. I’ll sort this out somehow. Again, thank you all for your concern and replies. Much gratitude.

FINAL UPDATE After so many exhausting hours of discussion, he needs some time away. I encouraged it (don’t think he liked me saying that..) - this will be my final update as now this became a relationship issue and much less about HRT .. stepping out of /Menopause and stepping into /Marriage. Thanks everyone for your time in replying to me. The rallying of so many women is truly empowering, and yes, we will continue the fight in owning our own bodies. Gratitude.