My son was suspended and I can’t wrap my head around it.

My son is an honor roll student. He goes to a less than favorable school. He has never been in trouble except for today. He was in his homeroom class at the end of the day and got into an altercation with a female student. The story goes he was talking to his friend in the back of the room, and the girl in front of him turns around and starts telling him that he is stupid. He fires back she is. This goes on between him and her saying things like “you’re special Ed.” She calls him retarded. He didn’t say that back to him. She calls him stupid again. He calls her stupid. She smacks him across the cheek, he punches her in the chest. She yanks him by his shirt and he loses balances and falls, to which he kicks her feet out from under her. She falls, rushes onto top of him and he pushes her off, leaving the room. Apparently, the teacher was in my supply room. My son said she was at her desk. This is very conflicting for me that the adult in the room was not present for the meeting of suspension or to see what was going on. Then there’s the why would this girl start talking to you like that and then there’s the claim that he was protecting himself, which is why he hit her after she slapped him. And then there’s my thoughts of not hitting a female at any capacity. Even if she hits you at all.

I’m at a loss. He is suspended and it’s on his record. The story has so many holes I want to understand. My son is distraught by his actions. My husband and I have spoken to him but he said he needs time to think more.

And I’m overthinking as to where I went wrong as a parent for this to occur.

Edit: hello, I am reading everyone’s comments. This is the story I was told. The other student was suspended, and yes, I know how that works. I work at my sons school as a sub, and apparently the female student has had problems in the past with hitting male and female students. The teacher was at her desk the whole time and did not do anything. His friend was with him and came and talk to me about the incident. Then other students. Some day he hit first, some say she did. In all, there are still a lot of missing info that I will never get. I am upset that my son was using words like “special Ed” to another student especially since his brother has autism.