Biased attitudes towards weight and loss

I’ve lost 96 pounds in the last year. I get comments/compliments weekly. It’s rare that someone doesn’t make a comment. Most of the time it is just, “you look great!”

However, sometimes there is a bit of judgement about having been heavy and it comes out in how they phrase their comments to me. People will say things like “I’m sure you feel so much better”, “I bet you have more energy”, and “I bet you notice a big difference in your capabilities now that you’ve lost so much weight.”

They really don’t like it when you tell them that your weight didn’t hold you back from doing your job or going out and doing things. It goes against their stereotype that people who are overweight/obese must have no energy, and can’t do their job well because the weight is holding them back.

In reality, I notice that my heels don’t hurt when walking a lot or standing around, allowing me to wear shoes other than tennis shoes and I no longer get winded climbing a couple of flights of stairs (although that could just be due to walking more on a daily basis). I fit in airplane seats easier, but I could fit before (but barely).

Now, with weight loss, I get cold easier. Since I’m still losing weight (about 5 or so pounds to go), I get low on energy if it’s close to meal time and I need some calories. I have extra skin I have to tuck into my pants, so I look like I have a bit of a belly. My boobs are completely flat but have to be cinched up, which causes back pain. My knees don’t have padding, so when I sleep on my side, I have to have a pillow between my legs/knees or it hurts.

Everyone is so conditioned to think that those that are overweight are held back by that weight and that everything is magically okay once it is gone. It’s such a biased view and can be frustrating. These might be the same people who judge you for taking the med to lose weight because “it’s the easy way”. I share that I’m on it, not for those people, but for those that struggle. I want them to know there is something that can help them, too. My boss reached out to me to find out more because she sees my success over the last year and is struggling with T2 diabetes. If this can help her, I’m glad I shared my journey so that she can be healthier.

Fortunately the snark is few and far between. Most people are purely curious and are respectful. But sometimes the bias is strong.