my mom told me her “friend” wanted to help me financially but in one condition.

Problem/Goal: my mother has a friend (who’s a doctor) who wanted to help me financially but in exchange for a relationship.

Context: i (f22) am a college student taking up vetmed in a state university. my family is not well off, but we also are not dirt poor, just barely enough to sustain ourselves in our daily lives. hs palang, ive been helping out my parents financially by alleviating the burden of paying tuition fees. i also sing in events to earn a bit. my siblings go to private schools while i was a scholar in a public science hs. my father is a retired engineer/seaman and my mother is a retired nurse turned farmer/businesswoman. my brother is currently outside ph as a working student to sustain himself, and my sister is still in hs. we only relied to our fam business which is our apartment and also our farm turned tesda school. then pandemic came, we really struggled financially that it came to a point that my older brother and i became trainers sa farm namin to help out. at that time also, i stopped schooling to find work because we needed funds for my brother’s visa and other expenses needed to go abroad. we really lacked money that my parents wanted to utilize my supposed college funds for my brother. (my brother didnt finish school and has also wasted a lot of money going through 3 private schools in diff places in ph so his last redemption arc was outside ph) i really needed to adjust and help him which was why i was a scholar in hs and aimed for a state u so i wouldn’t add to the burden since i also have a sister who is in a private school. i worked as an esl teacher, part time college instructor (for my mom) and also joined online singing contests + online tournaments through discord and other gaming platforms. altho it was disappointing that i had to stop school when i had only 1 year left to graduate shs, but mentally i also was not okay (which is another story)

fast forward to college, i didnt really ask that much from my parents, altho they wanted me to stay in expensive boarding houses for my confort, i always tell them no im okay with cheap ones as it also makes me sleep quite comfortably without thinking about money. i also dont eat breakfast, i usually eat 2 meals a day, but lately i only eat once a day or just do water therapy because i needed to budget my money for bills and equipment needed for my studies (which is vv expensive). i worked on part time gigs from time to time since i had a lot of vacant time in the first 2 years, however, since i am in my 3rd year, the subjects are getting demanding + challenging and it really needs the most attention right now so finding a job is quite difficult for me to balance and handle (lalo nat med school ako). again, bihira lang ako mag ask, and i grew up being used to working hard for the things i want, i only spend for what i need. whenever my parents ask what i want i always tell them wag, sayang money and all. pero lately, my allowance honestly is not enough to aid my needs for school so im also desperately finding part time gigs in my area and in reddit.

fast forward to kanina, my mom messaged me na she has a friend who offered to help me financially. i was doubtful and my trust issues were acting up so i asked her who and why?? i mean who would want to help me financially?? diko siya relative also. then my mom told me because ive been a hardworking and a great daughter so he wanted to aid my needs with money. all i needed was to message him. i asked for his name, i was shocked. i found out it was the guy i put in the spam folder for the longest time because he kept messaging me everyday. for context, arabo siya na you know gives messages na “hello love/sweetie/baby/dear” or “nice picture dear” or “iloveyou” and other random stickers showing affection (syempre i was freaked out)

i also found out na he was my mother’s old friend and that he wanted to help me, but in exchange i need to be in a relationship with him. i need to reciprocate his love and energy, “send pictures” of myself, and not tell my family about it especially my father and brother. syempre i was scared because this is my first time to receive this kind of offer. the pay is big yes, but the condition, for me labag na sa loob ko. yung konsensya ko di magpakali, this is something i really dont want to do, i also do not want to resort to that for money.

Previous Attempts: i wanted to say no to my mom after i read the message, and to my surprise she actually wanted me to do it, for me to not have a hard time, but at what cost? she is pushing me to do it because its a one time opportunity and that not everyone gives out money just like that. tapos gusto niya talaga ako tulungan. the family is also struggling so i might as well do it daw to not disappoint and be a burden. i mean she also sacrificed by working again as a caregiver abroad kahit retired na just to earn for the family. i also am quite in need of money. should i really do it? maybe di lang ako siguro that open minded on this line of work or offer.