Is anyone else high functioning, but internally struggling?

No one around me believes I’m mentally ill. And when I do explain it, they understand, but they comment that they don’t see it.

I did really struggle in my most recent romantic relationship, but otherwise I have done well.

I keep employment for long periods of time. I keep my cool in high stress situations. I have energy to be supportive and helpful to people. I have rarely every cried in front of people.

However, internally, I’m a mess. I think about suicide more often than I’d like to admit. I cry myself to sleep. I’m anxious as hell and suffering. Even when I’m having a good time, these feelings pop in. I just keep smiling, but internally it kills me.

And I just think about how everyone thinks I’m so strong, but I’m broken on the inside.