My Husband Pisses Me Off

I’m beyond pissed at my husband right now.

I’m am not thinking clearly, so I apologize in advance, if my post is hard to read.

We bought our house in 2018 (a two bedroom, two bath house) with plans to add on or fix up and sell for a bigger home, later.

Of course with finances and economy etc..we didn’t get to add on as soon as we wanted and/or sell and upgrade as planned. So, we were stuck until this past year.

We have two kids, and they’ve had to share a room for the last few years. In the beginning, it wasn’t a huge deal since our kids were still young. But as they’ve gotten older, (my oldest just started high school this year) we were feeling the pressure to do something since they needed their own space and we needed to upgrade a lot of things around the home, too.

So this year, we decided to plan on adding on and start repairs around the home. We officially finished the addition and most of the repairs by this summer.

Now here’s where our problem lies: my husband is impulsive AF. When he gets something on his mind, he obsesses and then jumps into something without thinking things through. This has been one of our biggest struggles in our marriage. I’m more of a realist who likes to ponder and take things slow, and my husband is the total opposite; he lives in fantasy land and makes these huge decisions without thinking of the consequences. It has caused us so much set back in the past.

Well..as you can imagine he has planned our renovations on our home by flying by the damn seat of his pants. Now, my husband has the ability and skills to do a lot of things. He is a ‘jack of all trades’ of sorts, and can do most things. But, he doesn’t know everything and refuses to accept that. One of those things is roofing a FUCKING house. Electrical work? I trust him to get it done right. (He’s an electrician). Plumbing? He’s capable. All the small details like dry wall and installing things, it’s all easy for him. However, he has no experience with roofing.

We, luckily, have a decent roof on the main part of our house. But the addition, that we just completed this summer, had to have an extended roof added to it. Instead of hiring a professional, my husband decides he’s going to save money and do it himself. I knew, initially, that was a bad idea. I even said something about it, but he just kept dismissing me and telling me not to worry about it. Since I know very little about house repairs and the like, I tried to trust him, but I always felt uneasy about it.

My husband found metal roof panels in a junk yard by his job and brought those home to use. I didn’t like that idea and even voiced my concern, but he assured me that they match our roof panels and should work. He had no one to help, so I got on the roof with him and helped him install the panels. Now, like I said earlier, I don’t know much, but even I know the way he wanted them installed didn’t seem right to me. I vocalized my concerns and he, again, dismissed what I had to say. Another concern I had, was the edges where the ‘new’ metal panels edges meet up to our already existing panels edges were not sealed. My husband was only sticking the black tape under them,but no other steps were being taken. I was under the impression that there has to be some sort of covering bolted down over the edges along with a sealant, but he told me that wasn’t true. I asked about what would happen if it rains and a potential leak, and he said that wouldn’t happen. I wasn’t convinced, but my husband is a smart guy (most of the time) and I knew that he wouldn’t take me seriously anyways. He also assured me that he worked on roofs before and knows what he’s doing. Ok..

We live in Texas and have been under an extreme drought (a record drought even for us) so it hasn’t been raining until the last few days.

We had our first big thunderstorm (since spring) last night and…ding, ding, ding! You guessed it! The roof started leaking. Water was pooling down from the attic into the ceiling. It even caused water damage into my office (I work from home).

I lost my ever loving shit! Me, who is usually mild tempered, calm - started screaming and hollering this morning. We have fought all morning over this mess! And I knew it! I knew how he was installing the roof was wrong, and he gas lit me the whole time! Making me feel like an idiot for even questioning.

Why are men so fucking full of themselves?

I have nothing more to add other than I am sick of knowing I’m right, only to be made to feel like I’m stupid! And then I have to face the consequences of his own actions!!!