Fitting Room Lady

I went into Kohl’s today, as I needed some new panties since my current pairs keep getting wadded up my ass.

I was already in a bad mood going there, since I was hungry as heck but had to order both a sandwich and a pizza from Ida’s. After porking that pizza down in my car, I figured I’d take the sandwich with me to shop around. I mean, if the soccer mommies can walk around Target with their Starbs, I should be able to browse TJ’s with my greasy Italian hoagie.

As I’m pawing through the racks of crappy fashion, hounding down my sandwich in bites between getting my saucy paws all over the clothes, I find a few pairs of panties that I think will do the trick in stopping my waddage.

Here’s the real kicker: when I went to go try the panties on, the TJ Maxx lady fitting room lady screamed at me that I couldn’t bring my hoagie into the changing room.

Shopping can be so hard sometimes. I wish these minimum wage workers that deal with the equivalent of grown brats all day would just leave me alone while I shop.

Just sharing to spread awareness about this meanie bo-beanie, and don’t bring sandwiches to go panty shopping.