CMV: There is no reason to ever get married without a prenup
Edit:I’m just adding this here because most of the comments are bringing it up, a prenup can include assets obtained during the marriage. So it is not a valid argument here to say “what if you don’t have anything when you get married”? And yes laws vary depending on your location.
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I know this topic has been done before but I wanted to address some popular responses.
First, my view is that everyone should have a prenup before marrying. You can have a lawyer draw one up for you if you’re daddy big bucks, or you can write one up yourself and have it notarized for some extra credibility. Either way you should have some agreement with your spouse regarding your finances before you marry.
It’s not about not trusting your partner, but people change. Not only may someone change and turn on you when the relationship sours but in general people change over time and you should protect yourself.
A common response is regarding inequities in earnings or assets if someone stays home and cares for the house and kids while the other works. But I don’t see this as an issue at all. It’s something that should be discussed ahead of time and the prenup is the perfect avenue to bring up things like that. If you plan to have children one day, write up the prenup to lay out how you’ll handle the division of assets ahead of time. If you have a child unexpectedly, add an amendment to your original prenup.
If you’re worried about being taken advantage of or slighted if you were to divorce, now is the time to find out. Now is the time to protect yourself and see how your spouse reacts. Are they open and willing to share everything with you? Or are they fighting you every step of the way.. very telling.
If anyone finds a prenup insulting, I’d honestly question their intentions. The goal is to protect both parties, and if you have no negative intentions then it shouldn’t be a problem and honestly might not even be necessary. But you have it anyway just in case.
My point is that people change. If you’re getting married you’re probably the most in love you’ve ever been, and you’re asking if your partner promises to protect you if you ever fall out of love. Not only can it protect stay at home parents from being left with nothing, it can also protect a successful career from being stolen from you by a spiteful ex.
Can anyone change my mind that there is no reason to ever get married without a prenup?
Final edit: thanks for all the comments everyone (even the ones who got irrationally angry) I can’t keep up with all the comments and despite what you may think, I have a loving wife to attend to haha.
I have awarded some deltas so I’ll end with this:
If you just straight up don’t WANT a prenup then I guess that’s a valid reason not to get one. While I still think it’s important to have those conversations, you don’t need a prenup if you don’t want one
Some countries and religions don’t vibe with prenups. If it’s against your culture, that’s a fair reason.
But I strongly disagree with everyone saying prenups are red flags. I see a prenup as insurance. Just because you wear your seatbelt doesn’t mean you want to crash your car. Doesn’t mean you’re not a responsible driver, or that you don’t trust your vehicle. But when something unexpected happens and you find yourself upside down in a ditch, you’re definitely thankful you had that protection.
Another note, I was wrong about children. I didn’t realize the intricacies around child support. And of course having legal counsel is always advised.