Desire to have a different father

I think my desire to have a completly different dad started at around 11 (im 17 ), i imagine how it would be to have a father that would hug me, talk to me, listen to me, care for me and do activities with me a lot. Sometimes i think aboout how it would be, to be an adult and have a father figure( like a sugar daddy without the sexuall stuff) that would help me build lego or when im not feeling good help me wash my hair or just comfort me. I think thats my way of coping with my feelings but im not sure if thats good or bad, i mean it cant be good to have those thought at 11 right?