Hopeful thinking

About a week ago I was in an anonymous internet chat room and was set on the idea that I wasn’t going to share my contacts with any people there. I was mostly just trolling around but had quite many wonderful conversations there as well.

One person was especially fun to talk to. We clicked immediately and unnoticeably chatted for almost 2 hours straight until he had to go eat dinner. So we said goodbye, swiped, and went on with our days. I thought that was the end of it, but for some reason I can’t get it out of my mind.

Day 1 and 2 were fine, but on day 3 I started missing him and went back on the platform hoping to accidentally connect with him again. Especially since that convo exceeded the quality of even the best convos I had there until now.
At some point it became obsessive. The only question I asked people was a specific one to identify him and then swiped immediately when I didn’t get the correct answer. Curiosity got the best of me and I also searched Reddit with different keywords hoping that he felt the same way and had made a post looking for me, but obviously not. Idek if he has Reddit.
That anonymous site used to be just a fun place to talk to people about random stuff, but I’m basically stuck doomscrolling there now until I find him.

Regular conversations feel boring now because of the dopamine shot I got from our convo. And I’m still stuck on this hopeful thinking that maybe he’s also still on the platform and maybe he’ll connect with me again. Maybe he’s also looking for me and maybe he will be waiting for me a week from the exact moment we met. I know, it’s stupid.

I don’t even have anything to gain from meeting up with him again. We’re never gonna meet irl because of how far away we live with one another. But I’m still just stuck thinking about the conversations we never got to have.

Any non-judgmental advice or comfort is welcomed lol