Embarrassed myself

I have been trying to get sober for a few months now and it all came to a head last night. I bought 2 bottles of wine and drank them over the course of 6 hours. After those bottles were done I stumbled to the door so I can go get more wine and my boyfriend tried to stop me. I had wine all over my face and my teeth were black. I told him I hated him. I don't remember the walk at all and I can't believe they served me. I got home( somehow) and continued to drink.

Boyfriend goes to bed and I'm still up drinking. Well I got lonely and started adding a whole bunch of people on Facebook. I told a guy that I liked him. I don't know why I did that. I woke up the next day and saw all the messages I sent and I'm so fucking embarrassed, I just deleted Facebook and Messenger. What the fuck is wrong with me???? I don't every want to drink again. I'm so fucking ashamed of myself and my boyfriend is livid with me. My heart is beating out of my chest. I don't know what to do. I want to jump off a bridge I'm so depressed

Update: I just wanted to say thank you all for the kind words. I have looked up AA meetings in my area. I still have FB and messenger deleted. I don't think I will reactivate it for a looooong time. I'm doing my best to not cringe every 5 mins. It will get easier with time, I know.