Feeling low tonight (but sober)

As the title says, I'm feeling low tonight. I was supposed to go see two of my closest friends today, but I made the choice not to because I knew I couldn't resist drinking if I went there.

Not drinking isn't an issue on a daily basis, my problem is I tend to take it too far when I drink, and end up anxious and depressed for days after. Not to mention the fatigue, brain fog, crappy sleep etc.

I've had a really rough month, I'm overworked, exhausted, life outside if work ain't easy either, Christmas is stressful as hell, and on top of that I'm on my period and I'm an absolute emotional mess right now.

So I canceled my my plans for the weekend, because I know that now more than ever, drinking is the worst possible thing I could do. What I need is rest, a whole lot of rest so I can make it to the holidays.

Not to mention that I really can't afford to spend money on booze right now, Christmas gifts and unexpected shit got me on a really tight budget this month, and drunk me somehow believes we've got Bill Gates' bank account all of the sudden.

I know I made the right decision for myself but I feel like crap regardless. I felt sad and lonely all day, I know my wacky hormones aren't helping but damn. I know my friends are partying right now and I kinda wish I was with them.

Sorry about that, just needed to let it out. Trying to think about my hangover-free morning tomorrow and that I won't be afraid to check my bank account, at least there's that. Day 22, IWNDWYT.