Treat yourself better and join/create a club

Reddit, discord, facebook group, Instagram group, twitter group, a smoke signal, SOS, pidgeon messages, a dark alley, something man. Find them somewhere.

Make the game less frustrating to play. Find like-minded people who are cool and just play games with them. You don't even have to talk really, just have cool vibes. If you're really competitive, run scrims against other groups or something.

Idk, just make sure your enjoyment of the game is not so subjected to a game of chance.